Events: Lifestyle/ Answers to questions.
I work in a country club where politeness and service is the rule. There is a dress code that is reasonable, and other standards which is what you expect in a country club. Being part of a family where rules were paramount, the idea of civility has been with me since my childhood.
My father would come into my room and make sure all my shoes were lined up properly. He wore a shirt and tie when he ate every meal at our apartment. The closets were immaculate and so was the rooms.
In my upbringing it was expected we would hold the doors for women and never wear a hat in a public building. There were exceptions if it was winter but those were the basics in my household.
The other day I was viewing the new season of Curb your Enthusiasm and in the first scene Larry David was entering through a door in a building. He glanced backward and noticed someone trailing him that was also about to enter the building but he did not hold the door for this individual. The whole bit was the individual was of an ambiguous physical type. She was offended that Larry did not hold the door for her. In his defense , he said he did not know she was a women and thought as an equality gesture , women do not want the door held open. The bit was funny but gave me some thought.
I hold doors open for both sexes, regardless of age. This seems to me the right thing to do but it is rarely practiced today. Most people are riveted to their cellphones, either making business deals, talking to the pope or watching cat videos.
Here is my question to my readers. What is the accepted distance that one should hold the door for when a person is behind you?
For example, if you are entering the doorway and you see a person about 30 feet away , do you wait for them? If you are in an elevator and the person is still a distance from you, do you hold the button ? How about if you are late for a meeting or an appointment, what is the acceptable distance to hold the door or for that matter , how long should you wait ? What is the alloted time frame?
I posed this question to my senior class that I lead in a fitness program 4 times a week. Without hesitation several answered 3 feet. They said that is the acceptable practice. This was news to me so I ask for your wise counsel and give me some guidance on this one.